[	mood	|	stressed	]
[	music	|	The Beatles~"Yesterday"	]

AH! i'm so pissed off! I was gonna come home to print this really cute picture of me and ahsley...and oh guess what! They are all gone! All of my pictures all of the gone! i was so pissed off. There were like 120 of them too. The only good one of Paul and i'm suppose to make him flyers for his birthday on May 7th! I'm hela pissed. Well from now on i'm gonna really save them on a disk and not be stupid and think that nothin' could happen.

My bill came today and i went over by $8 and they said that i went over by hella more so they are chargin' me like $130 for not payin' in like the first 3 days! whta bullshit!I called the customer service line and i told that ldy that it was all bullshit and that i shouldn't have to pay for minutes i didn't fuckin' use! then she was like "Oh yeah we can take this off and all this crap!" man i was so pissed off. Do thoes people  think that i'm that stupid to pay $130 for 15 minutes that i went over! Hellz no! oh man these companies think that anythin' they charge will be paid for? Dumbasses. More Dumbasses the poeple that actually pay and sit there silent while the money they could be usin to buy these bitches Jimmy Choo shoes...or stuffin' their mouths will food and buyin' useless junk! AGH!

Aywaysz. things for the arty are comin' along good. i don'tknwo if we are gonna practice over spring break but i don't even think that everyone is here so whats the point? I dont know... I wanna go to that Spring Jam thingy so bad!!! But first i need the money so yah! oh wellz i'll figure out somethin'!

Cheerleadin' tryoutz are on moday and i'm hella cared. Some of the people that are tryin' out piss me opff so i kinda don't want them to make it but as long as i do I will be ok~! Tootlez!

[	mood	|	pissed off	]
[	music	|	G-Unit "I wanna get to know you"	]

 
mood: Pissed off
music: NB Ridaz
Date: April 11, 2004
Time: 8:14 pm                                                                                        Location: my room                                                                                            Last words spoken: It's in the first drawer
first words heard: Are you awake yet?
Last words read: Breast cancer doen't just affect women
Last discovery: My dog's old chewing toy
Last disappointment: him not calling
Last laugh: The family guy
Last cry: him not calling
Last mistake: playing with his feelings
Last risk taken: falling for the guy
Last song heard: G-Unit "I wanna get to know you"
Last song sung along to: G-Unit "I wanna get to know you"
Last song danced to: "Salt Shaker"
Last CD played: G-Unit
Last movie seen for the first time: featdotcom
Last phone call: My sister
Last hug: Katy
Last strange encounter: Um being alone in the room with my dad 
Last new experience: Not sleeping
Last purchase: A Brown skirt and a teal top
Last gift given: A victorias secret kit
Last gift recieved: money
Last meal: Spagetti, Salad and water
Last pleasure: making a collage
Last pain: u not callin me
Last quote to come to mind: wheres the good in goodbye?

Well i was just eating with my family an dthen my dad starts bitching at me (like usual) for nothing. I was eating with my mom an dtalking with her and then he just goes you cant do anything ok? You never want to spend time with us! Dadadadadadadada and so on! Well how the hell can  spend time with him if he is always working and when he's not working he's complaining about something an dhow he never has money and ragging on me. i think thats why i stoped trying. It doesn't seem worth it if he's always just gonna be a bitch about everything! i cant wait till Cheerleading starts again... At least then i will have an excuse not to be here anymore. It's way too stresfull. He's always like why can't you be like Veronica and all this crap, It hurts but i hate to show my weakness to the guy. ok well then we were counting the invitations for my quinceanera because there ar o more left you know? an dthen he goes why the hell should you get any you only have to give one to your damas and your chambelanes... Hello! its MY party. Me vuelve loca. Yo lo quiero y todo pero unas vese quisiera tener ya 18 para poder irme. oh well. He makes me feel like it's my fault that the guy at the invitation thingy just gave us 80 something instead of 100. Uhh!

[	mood	|	crushed	]
[	music	|	i dont want to know	]

Ok so this is a picture of my lovely bogota, colombia. i hope that some day i go back. i really clench when i think about it. i hella just wanna go back to colombia, not to live because it would be to much of a dastric change but at leats to go and stand on my countrys streets and breath its air. its so beautifull i had a dream last night that i was in bogota but i was watching myself for the whole 4 years that i was there. I watched myself be born and have my ears piecred and everything that happened when i was there. Also when i left i saw myself crying as i left my brothers behind in bucaramanga. now they are both here along with my sister but i haven't seen the rest of my family, besides occasional visits by my uncle, aunt and cousin. oh well i know someday i will be back there (I hope!)

[	mood	|	annoyed	]
[	music	|	Tony Bennet "I left my heart in San Francisco"	]

You know how i told you that i love black and white pictures! well  found my two favorite things rapped up into one! Black and white picture of an eye.

Wow this is so beautiful.!

 ok so i was just looking at pictures and i saw this, so i thought i would put it on here. i know people may think that she is lame but i really like britney spears. who the hell cares if shes not a virgin most people arent! Well then i was looking at more pictures and some of  them were really beautiful but then it also showed the violence in this world. Really can one apreciate all the beauty in the world and all the great things if everytime you open your eyes there is something about violence or "Imma' kill that Bitch because she looked at my man!" ugh, yeah people get pissed off, who really doesnt but then again is that a reason to just take all your anger out and then end up doing something that you will end up regreting. I know about 5 kidz my age that are now expeled or in juvi because they couldn't controll their damn temper. Personaly i think thats bullshit. If  Romeo had waited just a little longer before he went into his whole drama queen thing then they would have been togetehr and the plan would have worked. but then the most talked about tragedy in history would have never been. i dont know i just think that saying that im gonna knock hat bitch out is stupid. just deal with it and move on. Chao!

[	mood	|	bitchy	]
[	music	|	"confesions" Usher	]

ok so last night (or this morning) whatever, i went to bed at 5:30 in the morining and carlos decides to call me at like 11:30 i know that it isnt early at all but i was so fucking tired. then my neighboors dog was barking so damn loud and then i guess he was having a interesting conversation with my dogs because they responded and it was dricing me insane! ok so i woke up and the whole downstairs was a mess so i cleaned and then i remembered that i was hungry so i made myself a sandwitch and watched my favorite moviie in the world "Thirteen" i really cant waitto get a picture phone..if i dont get it as a present and i get money that is what im gonna use the money for! ok Chao!

[	mood	|	awake	]
[	music	|	roses- outkast	]

"i'm drivin' in my car, and im listening to the radio...listening to a sad girl sign sign about how she got her heart broke."

I feel inlove with the most beautiful boy in the world and then when he left, i thought i would die.but i didn't. And now all i can think is, "is that al there is to love?"

Is a fantasy that will not come true unless the pages of the book stop turnig,

But in real life the pages always turn.

So you get over it

And kep reading -or-

you ignore the new pages

Rip them out of the book even

And you throw them away

But then you become lost with no desire to be found

And in the wilderness you become a casualty,

Of your own stubburness

Instead of a survivor. 

[	mood	|	busy	]
[	music	|	i dont wanna know ( p.diddy and soem other fine guy)	]

From the moment we said "hello"

To the moment i said "Goodbye"

I kept you close to you heart                                            

And even closer by my side.

I stood by you evry step of the way,

Even when you hurt this heart of mine

i loved you as time went on,

I guess that makes me all the more blind

I should've seen this coming,

I should've known what to do

To know the words you said to her

Were the precious, ilove you

I thought i was specila

I thought it was me with whom you were inlove,

But now i know,

It was just my wish from above...

I beleived in you, and trusted you

i gave you my heart... totally

I thought you loved me,

just like i loved you uncoditionaly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He told her that if he'd come with him

They could stay at his sister's in Vicksburg,

Then catch the Greyhound North of Pennsylvania

And maybe there he'd find work and make it soem way,

She asked how he was going to buy two tickets to pittsburg

When he did't have even a dime and he said

He'd offer to drive a bus halfway

And this mad some kind of desperate sence to her

so she went.